Perhaps I shouldn't have taken a fight that required me to lose 20lbs in a little over 2 weeks time. I cut 8lbs 24hrs before weigh in. 

Perhaps the weight loss was too much of a distraction, too rough on my body and too damaging to my condition.

Perhaps I cracked under pressure, with running my own business and wanting to be a strong role model for them. Perhaps I wanted too much to prove to them that I could do everything, beat the odds, and represent what it means to be an empowered, fierce female.

Perhaps I just lost because my opponent was simply the better fighter.

Perhaps I will never know but what I do know is that the fighter I stepped into the ring as wasn't the fighter I actually am and for this I am sorry to those who came to cheer me on. I don't remember the fight and I was shocked at how it ended.

But life goes on. 

The sun will still come up tomorrow, the birds will still sing, and when I go home, despite losing, my two little puppies will still greet me with smiles and licks to my face.

This is but a blip in time, a hard moment to accept and an even harder lesson to take but I know you have to grow through what you go through and what doesn't break you makes you stronger.

Thank you to all my friends, fans and new found fans that were there cheering me on. I am sorry I didn't showcase my talent and really show you the fighter I am.